Are You Your Own Worst Enemy? Free Yourself From past Mistakes

Are You Your Own Worst Enemy? Free Yourself From Past Mistakes

There is little difference in people, but that little difference makes a big difference. The little difference is attitude. The big difference is whether it is positive or negative. ~ W. Clement Stone

Moving forward, freeing yourself from past mistakes and messes is a critical part of being happy.Sometimes our very thoughts and habits of action are our biggest enemies, preventing us from ever moving out of our comfortable, if miserable, slot in life.

There might not be one clear path to happiness and success that fits all, but to head for new horizons means you have to be willing to stop selling yourself short and change the state of mind that’s keeping you where you are.

My greatest challenges in changing my state of mind over the years have been inconsistency and not having proper direction. Eventually I hunted out helpful teachings and sayings that I could apply to my life on a daily basis. Just to name a few…

Keep Your Eyes Open

Many of us can speak eloquently of what we don’t want in life. We’re directionless; stumbling around in the dark, only aware of what we’re afraid of and where we don’t want to go.

Don’t let that be good enough for you. Without a destination you’re lost or stuck where you are.

Become more aware of what’s taking place within. The words you speak to yourself, the mind chatter, the beliefs that you cherish and hold so tightly will all be reflected in your outer world.

The greater awareness you bring to the process of living, creates a space for more choices.  Being aware of who you are and how you operate in life gives you the freedom to respond or react to the circumstances of your life the best way you can.

Stop trying to do it all

It isn’t possible to be in control of every aspect of life. So stop trying. Be clear on the fundamental concepts that will have the greatest impact on your quality of life and begin to master them.

Ask yourself “Does what I’m doing right now resonate with me?” There’s little point in succeeding in the things that bring no value to you or those in your sphere.

Stick with the basics and one basic that was necessary in changing my mind set was…

The gratitude habit

Gratitude is a powerful tool for me. Even when everything is going to hell in a hand-basket there’s something to be thankful for.

I discovered that regardless of how horrible things seemed to be if I could still be aware of blessings in my life…I would actually be okay.

Gratitude isn’t simply about giving thanks because you just got what you wanted. It’s a daily practice where you consistently look for the good.

Begin today to bring gratitude into your life with your every day, normal, run of the mill experiences.  Don’t wait to get what you want before you feel grateful. Become a master of gratitude and enhance your life experience.

Dont fear failure

Most of us learn to do something right by first getting it wrong.

You must use your failures and mistakes and messes to chart a new course, or tweak a good idea. Each failure or lesson learned are a necessary part of your growth, not an excuse to do nothing, to give up, or to stay stuck. That’s a route to regret.

Let nothing get in the way of your dreams. Don’t put them off because it isn’t easy, or something didn’t work out the way it was supposed to. Tomorrow never arrives.

Use each experience of joy or despair, of loves beginnings and endings as a means to tap the power within and keep moving forward.

Don't allow adversity to define you

The greatest challenge in life is to be in command of our thinking process. One place where no-one else has any power. The way you think, the way you respond has a greater potential to wreck your life than any problem you might face.

Alter the judgements you make, the way you perceive experiences and how you decide upon the primary issues in life and you’ll be in a position to become more creative in managing the effects of your previous thinking. You'll be better placed to generate improved ideas to solving.

You aren't defined by the problems in your life,  but how you handle them. Breathe a little. Fall asleep every night in the thought 'something wonderful is happening for me now'

And expect to see it. There's is spiritual power within you that's perfect. Choose to not to let adversity define but instead positively choose to define yourself in terms of your success. It's a lot more fun, feels better and makes each day something to look forward to instead of dread

Architect of your Destiny

Architects are skilled in planning, design, and oversight.  Architecture isn't just limited to the construction of buildings. For example,  often visionaries are architects of their generations.  When you look at the leaders of yesterday and today, such as Martin Luther King,  Henry Ford, Bill Gates,  Steve Jobs, and Nelson Mandela they are architects of sorts.  They planned,  designed, and oversaw huge transitions that, in many cases, redefined how we function and process reality on a daily basis.  Similarly, we can be the architects of our own lives.

Here are ways to awaken your inner architect.

1. Architects Create Vision

Vision is Key

Your vision can literally serve as your blueprint for the future. Your ability to walk into the life you crave depends on the future you see. That's because anything exceptional that you attempt is often birthed with a vision. It's the vision that inspires hope when the struggle gets too hard and calamity becomes all too familiar. That's why is important to not bankrupt your future with a limited  vision.  It's hard to move forward confidently without having a good idea of where you are going. Powerful motivator Zig Zaglar always says if you aim for nothing, you'll hit the mark every time.

The are numerous reasons for lack of vision. Sometimes it's the pain of previous failures that halts our progress. In such cases, we have to remember that missteps bring experience and provide insight; moreover, our survival is a testimony of our resilience. Other times we're blinded by compliancy with past successes. However, suppose we had stopped with with the telegram or the telephone?

Our lives have been so enriched by people who dared to see beyond present circumstances and innovations. These architects changed the future by elevating our visions. According to Seth Godin, they transform our "shared interest into a passionate goal and desire for change". Just because you are not gifted in design doesn't mean that you can't design your life.  First,  your ability to create the vision for your life necessitates your commitment to learn and look inward.

Second,  when you peer into the future, make sure that you are looking with a fresh pair of eyes and perspective. Tired eyes rarely see a bright future.

Third,  your vision for your future may benefit from some perspective of the past.  History often repeats itself, so ironically, by looking to the past, you can better anticipate the future.

Fourth, draw inspiration from what you read, hear, and feel. Then, create the plan that awakens the music inside you. Remember that prosperity and wealth are not beyond your reach.  Doing these things consistently will elevate your vision to new levels and give you a sound basis to design an authentic path for your future.

2. Architects Oversee Development

Don't die with your music still in you!

It's the architect's role to oversee the execution of the vision. Overseers know that productivity, or lack thereof, often depends on their recruiting the talent, incentivizing their participation, and providing adequate resources and direction to bring vision into fruition.
The personal application is that we must oversee our own development.  We must hold ourselves accountable for acting on our visions; otherwise, they remain pipe dreams. Often this may require enlisting the assistance of others. Perhaps you may hire a bookkeeper for a business or even your household finances to stay on track financial. Alternatively, you could engage a coach to quickly raise your performance to a much higher level. You may choose an accountability partner to call foul when your actions don't match your words.
Regardless of the steps you take, the responsibility for the product is yours. You have already been empowered, but it is what you do with that power that is key.

3. Closing Thoughts

As an architect, you can create beauty from chaos or resurrect a structure to its former glory. It's your blueprint of the future that inspires hope in the face of adversity and order during disarray. It's your seasoned insights that are relied upon to ensure the safety and progress of the project. The personal takeaway is that as the architect of your life, you have substantial power. However, with this power comes a great responsibility. It is no longer acceptable to rely on past excuses for lack of achievement. You already have the components and resources for greatness, but the key question is: are you ready to produce?

Simplify and Focus on the Essential

"Purity and simplicity are the two wings  with which man soars above the earth and all temporary nature"

Simplicity brings balance,  freedom,  and joy. When we begin to live simply and experience these benefits, we begin to ask the next question,  where else in my life can I remove distraction and simply focus on the essential? "

Based on my personal journey, my conversations, and my observations, here is a list of most important things to simplify in your life today to begin living a more balanced,  joyful lifestyle:

1. Your Possessions- Too many material possessions complicate our lives to a greater degree than we ever give them credit.  They drain our bank account, our energy,  and our attention. They keep us from the ones we love and from living a life based on our values. If you will invest the time to remove nonessential possessions from your life, you will never regret it.

2. Your Commitments- Most of us have filled our days full from beginning to end with time commitments: work, home,  kid's activities,  community events, religious endeavours,  hobbies. ....the list goes on.  When possible,  release yourself from the time commitments that are not in line with your greatest values.

3. Your Goals- Reduce the number of your goals you are intentionally striving for your life to one or two.  By reducing the number of goals that you are striving to accomplish, you will improve your focus and your success rate. Make a list of the things that you want to accomplish in your life and choose the two most important.  When you finish, add another from your list.

4. Your Negative Thoughts- Most negative emotions are completely useless. Resentment, bitterness, hate,  and jealousy have never improved the quality of life for a single human being. Take responsibility for your mind.  Forgive past hurts and replace  negative thoughts with positive ones

4. Your Debts-If debt is holding you captive,  reduce it.  Start today.  Do what you've got to do to get out from under its weight.  Find the help that you need.  Sacrifice luxury to enjoy freedom tomorrow.

6. Your Words- Use few words. Keep your speech plain and honest. Mean what you say. Avoid gossip.

7. Your Artificial ingridients- Avoid fats, refined grain, and too much sodium.  Minimizing these ingredients will improve your energy level in short-term and your health in the long-term.  Also, as much as possible, reduce your consumption of over-the-counter medicine- allow your body to heal itself naturally as opposed to building a dependency on substances.

8. Your Screen Time- Focusing your attention on television, movies, video games, technology affects your life more than you think.  Media rearranges your values. It begins to dominate your life.  And it has a profound impact on your attitude and outlook. Unfortunately, when you live in that world on a consistent basis, you don't even notice how it is impacting you.  The only way to fully appreciate it's influence in your life is to turn them off.

9. Your Connections to the World- Relationships with others are good,  but constant streams of distraction are bad.  Learn when to power off the blackberry,  log off Facebook,  or not read a text.  Focus on the important, not the urgent.  A steady flow of distractions from other people may make us feel important, needed, or wanted, but feeling important and accomplishing importance are completely different things.

10. Your Multi-Tasking- Research indicates that multi-tasking increase stress and lowers productivity.  While single-tasking is becoming a lost art,  learn it.  Handle one task at a time.  Do it well.  And when it is complete,  move to the next

Victor Mastermind Coach linked

Candy Tsamandebele- On Phalaborwa FM 105.1mhz hosted by DJ Shirley M. Arranged and brought to you by Victor Mastermind Coach

Fiks Hlungwane- Life Coach, Trainer and Consultant (Rivongo Life Coach)

Mpumelele Ndumo- Founder & Managing Director of Thutuka SA and Author ( 7 Secrets Why The Rich Own Their Homes. From Debt to Riches

Linda Yende-Motivational Speaker and Author (Wakeup Woman)

Deena Naidoo-Masterchef South Africa 2012 Winner